Five Ways You’re Being Gaslighted

Sep 02, 2020

Gaslighting is a form of manipulation, and if you’re hurting, something isn’t right. Your feelings are a gift, and they serve as signals to inform you of what’s happening to you and how to respond. If someone is trying to take away from your experience, you are being gaslighted.

How many times have you heard any of the following …

“You’re really not hurt that bad.”

“If you wouldn’t have done X, then Y would have never happened to you, and you’d be fine.”

“You’re just overreacting.”

“Nothing is wrong. You’re just crazy.”

“You really shouldn’t make a big deal about this.”

“Chill out. Everything is fine.”

“You’re the only person who feels that way.”

There are several examples of things people say that disregard your feelings. Sometimes they’re subtle and may seem harmless, but other times they’re blatant and cause more pain.

Let’s look at five ways someone has gaslighted you:

  • You’ve lost touch with reality.
  • Your experience is being denied.
  • Your feelings are being undermined.
  • You’re more confused about what happened.
  • You’re experiencing guilt and shame that may not belong to you.

So, what do you do from here? It starts by taking steps towards becoming a healthier person so that you can recognize toxic patterns in unsafe relationships. From there, we can work towards getting in touch with our reality, and the reality of the situation at hand.