Why You Can't Change Someone Apr 19, 2022

Are you in some type of relationship (it could be personal or work-related) where you are trying to get someone to be or do something different? But that person isn’t listening, or doesn’t desire to change, or doesn’t want what you want for him or her?

If so ... it’s time...

Continue Reading...
Why It's Brave to Be Vulnerable Apr 13, 2022

It felt like I was at Wimbledon watching a tennis match, but instead of a tennis ball that was flying back and forth, it was blame. In tennis, players hit the ball back and forth over the net. In this counseling session with Jeremy and Rachel, one would blame the other, and before the shot ever...

Continue Reading...
How to Teach Your Teen to Take Responsibility Apr 13, 2022

My daughters and I recall with laughter the game that we began years ago to combat blaming and excusing in our house. It did not begin with a case of “The dog hate my homework,” but with a dad (me) who was about ready to catch his hair on fire if he heard one more “But she...

Continue Reading...
Your Anger Isn't a Sin Apr 13, 2022

In the last 30 years or so, we have seen a big swing in the way that Christians look at anger. Back then, it was almost all seen as sin. And, there are a lot of verses that tell us about the danger of anger, for it can be a very destructive emotion. As Proverbs 27:4 says, “Anger is cruel...

Continue Reading...
Saying No is Enough — You Don’t Have to Justify It Apr 06, 2022

Psychologists spend an enormous amount of energy building psychological tests, assessments, and the like, and then administering them to people to help them understand themselves. This practice is very helpful in many settings, from work, to education, to couples and individuals. Insight into...

Continue Reading...
How to Disagree and Come to An Amicable Resolution Apr 04, 2022

Any good confrontation takes into account that two people are involved. This sounds obvious, but it really isn’t, and it is an essential part of an effective boundary conversation.

One reason you have a problem in the first place is that you and the person you want to confront are not of...

Continue Reading...
5 Reasons to Give Yourself Permission to Ask For Help Apr 02, 2022

Sometimes we struggle to ask for help. You may be the person everyone runs to for help, or maybe you feel like you would be a burden to someone. Let’s talk about the ways that make it ok for us to seek help from others.

Here are a few of the reasons asking is helpful for us:

  1. When we ask,...
Continue Reading...
Marriage is Not a Shortcut to Maturity Apr 01, 2022

Marriage is intended by God as a union of two complete persons. It is only when two mature and whole individuals come together in marriage that their union will be complete. Marriage is not designed to be a shortcut to maturity, a way of completing yourself. Rather, God designed marriage as a way...

Continue Reading...
What Does the Bible Say about Toxic People? Mar 17, 2022

The Bible often warns us to avoid toxic people, or at least their toxic behavior. God wants us to be very careful to stay clear of people who can destroy the life that he desires to create for us. Listen to the way that King David put it:

The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to...

Continue Reading...
What Christians Get Wrong About Grace Mar 17, 2022

Many Christians misunderstand grace, even those who are helping people grow. Usually people think that grace means forgiveness or the absence of condemnation. And the God of grace is the one who forgives. But while forgiveness is an expression of the grace of God, grace is much bigger than just...

Continue Reading...
Does Guilt Keep You From Feeling Forgiven? Mar 13, 2022

“No matter how many times I read that I'm forgiven, I just don't feel it," Stephen said. "I know the Bible tells me God accepts me. I know it in my head, but I can't feel it in my heart."

"What have you tried to do to change that?" I asked. 

"Well, I've tried memorizing verses and...

Continue Reading...
I Promise God Forgives You - Here's Why Mar 12, 2022

Many times, the pain that we drag into new situations is the pain of failure from the past. If you are feeling guilty or ashamed of things that you have done, you can have difficulty going into new relationships or situations because you feel "bad" or "unworthy." To tackle life with gusto, we...

Continue Reading...