Five Ways You’re Being Gaslighted Sep 01, 2020

Gaslighting is a form of manipulation, and if you’re hurting, something isn’t right. Your feelings are a gift, and they serve as signals to inform you of what’s happening to you and how to respond. If someone is trying to take away from your experience, you are being gaslighted....

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Empower Yourself to Take Control and Be Free Aug 29, 2020

If you’re going to get in control of your life, you’re going to have to do just that — get in control. You cannot control other people, but you can get in control of yourself. You have to be able to make the choices you need in order to make your life work, belong to you and...

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Is Revenge Ever OK? Aug 28, 2020

Those who have good boundaries have transcended the need for revenge. Their first goal is to make things better for the other person or group. The other’s benefit is their utmost concern. That does not mean they have no interest at all in their own benefit. It simply means that in their...

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Why You Can't Change Your Partner Aug 26, 2020

Stephanie was in love with Kyle. They were great together. They problem was that they had very different definitions of what “together” meant. For Stephanie, it meant being firmly committed and moving toward marriage. For Kyle, it meant being together when he was around, yet his being...

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How to Stay in Control When You Confront Someone Aug 26, 2020

If you are the one doing the confronting, and you believe you’ve prepared well for it, then you likely have the self-control to evaluate and speak to another’s behavior. Remember, you’re doing this from a stance of love for the person and the relationship.

Although you’ve...

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How to Get to the Truth, Even When It’s Uncomfortable Aug 25, 2020

Maybe you've heard this before — Become a student of yourself. It’s a trait of successful people, and they achieve that success because they’re able to confront the truth about themselves to get over their inaccurate and unhelpful thinking patterns.

When I consult with people...

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How to Process a Loss in Your Life Aug 24, 2020

I worked on a project one time with a person who had been highly acclaimed in corporate circles and was well-known for his accomplishments in marketing around the world. Many organizations were trying to recruit him for his expertise, and I was excited at the opportunity to work with him. I was...

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Why Grief is Different from Other Kinds of Suffering Aug 23, 2020

Grief is the toughest pain we have to deal with. It is not the worst human experience, because it leads to resolution, but it is the most difficult for us to inter into voluntarily, which is the only way to get into it. The rest of our human experience just happens “to us.” Hurt,...

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Don’t Mind What Other People Think About You Aug 23, 2020

As with feelings and attitudes, we must own our own thoughts. Our thoughts have much bearing on our emotional growth. Not all emotional disturbance comes from thinking, but it does play a vital part. (In reality, our emotions affect our thinking more than the other way around because feeling is...

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Seven Ways to Disrespect Your Significant Other Aug 22, 2020

Building boundaries in dating situations means that a couple needs to know that their feelings, needs, and freedom are respected. When someone is uncomfortable in a sexual situation, or is hurt by a sarcastic remark, or becomes angry with a broken promise, that is a signal that something is going...

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The Bad Habit That Destroys Relationships Aug 21, 2020

Playing fair will destroy every relationship in your life.

Fair is giving good things to others as long as they give good things to us. Then if they fail us in some way, we respond “fairly.” We give it right back to them, either at the moment or soon thereafter. Either our words or...

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Why Self Help Isn't a Real Concept Aug 20, 2020

Self-help is an oxymoron. If we have a problem in something we can't do, then to think that we are going to be the solution when we are the problem is kinda goofy. It's sorta like your car is out of gas, and you're gonna tell it to get some self-gas. That just doesn't work.

Everything we know...

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