It was a holiday weekend, and I was at a celebration that included a memorial “paddle out” on surfboards in the Pacific Ocean to honor and remember my brother-in-law, Mark. He was a Navy SEAL, a great American, husband, father, hero, brother, and a friend. Mark died on a mission in...
You develop codependent habits because you care, and you don’t want to hurt anyone. You want to see an addict get better or feel good, but When we see our loved ones suffering, it’s easy to want to come to their rescue. But the reality is, you can’t just take on their feelings,...
In life, you don't get what you want. You get what you negotiate. The things we want are very doable. They're attainable. But there's an obstacle in the way because it requires an agreement from someone on the other side that has some power to block it or say no. And we have to be able to get to...
What’s your relationship with the word no? Do you get along well? Are you friends, or are you strangers?
If I’ve got a conflict with the word no, then I am going to have some problems in life. The word no is one of the most important tools that you have in your toolbox...
As you go through this list, I want you to know that it isn’t exhaustive, but in each one of these relationships, we see common problems with boundaries and those who violate them. Keep this list handy, as it can serve as a resource for you to refer back to when you need a reminder.
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We were created to need a close and intimate relationship not with others. Relationships are the fuel of life. They provide us with acceptance, encouragement, empathy, wisdom, and a host of other relational nutrients. These nutrients keep us healthy and growing. In fact, many studies have shown...
Do a dictionary search on pruning and you’ll discover phrases like this: A function of cutting away to reduce the extent or reach of something by taking away unwanted or superfluous parts.
Wow, if only we would lead and live by definitions! In the simple word pruning is the central theme...
You need to realize how much time and energy you have, and manage your work accordingly.
Know what you can do and when you can do it, and say no to everything else.
Learn to know your limits and enforce them, as Laurie did. Say to your team or your boss, “If I am going to do A today, I will...
Danielle had a problem with tardiness. She believed time was like an accordion; the more events you packed into it, the more it would simply stretch to accommodate the activities. As a result, she always planned too many things for a particular time period, thinking she had time to do them, and...
Life and business involve pain. Sometimes, creating an ending might cause a little hurt, like pulling a tooth. But it is good pain. If gives life to you or to your business. Similarly, the rosebush snaps back when it gets pruned.
But there is another kind of pain, one that should not be embraced,...
In the words of Steven Covey, it’s important to “begin with the end in mind.” Let’s be clear about that here. What is it we are trying to accomplish? The simple answer is this:
Gain control.
We are not trying to gain control of other people or of all the circumstances or...
There are a thousand ways we humans have come up with to self-medicate, but they are all ultimately a trap of our own devising and lead to diminished lives. One executive I worked with used to medicate with retail therapy. When I asked her about it, she said, “This is how I medicate....
